Tuesday, November 24, 2009

on a larger scale,

my teenaged problems are so insignificant.
as a person, i am barely a drop of water cycling through every ocean on the planet. i can't even begin to comprehend the vastness of the world outside my window. my wildest dreams are another's reality, and vice versa.
i want to learn, discover, motivate, and be inspired. do i ever just want to be inspired. and there's a lot of inspiring stuff out there. it would be easy to find if i just opened my eyes. i want to, but i'm scared. in fact, i am terrified.
it's been time to jump for a while. the springs are tight, and i'm holding my breath; i'm just worried about the fall.

1 comment:

  1. Problems are subjective.

    There's a man. He's 40 years old. His 3 children all died in a car crash, the last words spoken between them being "I hate you." His wife divorced him soon after. She then moved in with family half the world away. The man is alone. At night he cries for everything he's lost. This man saw a young boy playing outside. The boy bounced his ball for a while then dropped it, swatting around his head at what the man assumed was a bee. The boy then fell to the ground, clutching the side of his neck, screaming in pain. The boy ran back inside his house. This was the worst day of that boy's young life. Never before had he felt this pain or disappointment.

    The feelings that boy experienced that day were the worst he'd ever had. But the man knew it as something so mediocre, so meaningless in comparison to the anguish he'd experienced in his 40 years. Later that day, the man received a call from his ex-wife's mother, telling him that his ex-wife had committed suicide, naming him as a cause in her final note. Of all the pain in his past, the man experienced a new worst.

    The point is that there will always be people experiencing things that make your problems seem less significant. But until we experience those things for ourselves, our own experiences and problems are all we have - all we know for sure. They are the truest representations of the feelings we know exist and there is no reason to spoil them with doubts or speculation about greater, or situationally, worse, things.

    There is a wide world for us to experience. But if we concentrate on what could be or what has been, we lose sight of the experiences in our present.

    Wish I could express that better.